High school marriages

Just read this from a featured zanga blog. 
Think I should be thinking along this line :)
IM STILL TOO YOUNG! NEED TO GO OUT THERE AND ENJOY!
PEOPLE OUR AGE SHOULD NOT BE SO EMO!


I'm graduating this year. By the time you're a senior, you realize the idea of eternal high school relationships and childhood love is mainly just movie material. I know one or two couples in my class that have been together since forever. The first couple has dated since the summer before freshmen year and the other couple got together freshmen year. The rest of the kids that promised each other forever, that exchanged notes saying they were soul mates, and quoted romantic lyrics to each other now are with someone else. As I'm nearing graduation, however, I'm noticing quite a few of my classmates are getting married.

They have rings. They're moving in with each other. They've got apartments picked out and are talking about the children they intend on having. Everyone dreams about the time they'll be with someone at some point. I just think that fresh out of high school is too soon to be thinking along those lines. I mean it's a time when most are figuring out who they are, what they want to do, and where they'll be heading. There's so many things that are left to enjoy in the last of your youth that you'll have to miss out on. Some might be emotionally and mentally ready to commit themselves like that - to sort their lives out that young - but I think a lot of them don't know what they're facing until it's too late.

How do you know at that age if the person you're dating then is what you'll want later? The things you wanted and needed and were into five years ago are probably vastly different than what they are now. At eighteen or seventeen, you're in the midst of changing who you are. You're expected to be more financially independent and mature in a few years. Your high school friends and experiences will fade away as you gain new experience and insight on the world. At this age, you're just acquainted with the kids you knew from high school. At college and in the real world, the dating pool gets much larger and the dynamic changes. What you had in high school may not be as fulfilling as what's there waiting in college or after college. The people you dated in high school are going to have different stories and more experience to guide them around in college.

Growing up should be a gradual process not something required from an overnight honey moon. You didn't just get up and soar across the room. You started out crawling, then progressed to standing up on things as you supported yourself, and then took small steps until you were walking. After graduating, you'll be overwhelmed with figuring out your life. Are you attending college? Are you going to the army? What are you going to do after the army or college? What's your major? Are you moving in with somebody's family or getting an apartment? How are you supporting yourself? How will you get a job? What are your options if you leave that job? All of these questions are a lot to think about at that age and that's just for one person. It's going to be more stressful trying to balance a relationship and committing to someone else above all other things when you have enough as your plate. If you eat that meal too fast, you might choke.

How long have you known the other person? In the cases where the couples were getting married out of high school, they were just now reaching their year marks. The honey moon phase of a relationship generally burns out around then. At first, the emotions you feel can be overwhelming and blind you from the other person's faults. It's when those emotions cool and you step back a little that the love solidifies into something more stable - something more real - and it seems odd to commit to someone before that point. Few people in high school have had enough long term relationships to fully realize what they need to survive a relationship that long. They just don't have the experience. Although things may seem dandy now, how'll your significant other person be down the road? Have you really seen that person at their lowest? How will you guys face the things that tick you off as a couple with the demands of school, work, family/friends, and utilities on your hands? It's harder to sort things out and compromise when you have other obligations.

In my eyes, you have the rest of your life to find someone. You have so much going for you now and there's so much left of life to live before giving it up like that.